Stoicism offers a timeless template to remain at peace in howsoever painful situation you find yourself. It is to differentiate between what is in and what is out of your control. Chasing what is out of your control will cause frustration. We should, therefore, focus on what is within our control- our feelings, emotions and reactions and this will help us maintain our peace of mind.
Embracing Stoicism in
Everyday Living
In the quest for
profound insights into life's dilemmas—how to be virtuous, find serenity, cope
with grief, overcome FOMO, and discern what truly matters—we discover that the
sagacious minds of history grappled with identical questions and unearthed
solutions. Stoicism, an ancient
philosophy, reveals that the essential tools for excavating timeless wisdom are
already within our grasp.
Journeying back to an era resembling our own, fraught with chaos,
warfare, plagues, deceit, and existential concerns, we find solace in the
teachings of three venerable Stoic mentors: Seneca, Epictetus, and Marcus
Aurelius. By immersing ourselves in their wisdom, we can assimilate Stoic
principles into our lives, regaining a sense of agency and tranquility.
While Stoicism may initially appear challenging, it becomes an invaluable remedy for life's challenges if approached with determination to enhance one's existence. From managing FOMO to navigating economic hardships, confronting job rejections, addressing climate concerns, and coping with heartbreak, Stoicism offers a timeless template for resilience and contemplation. The counsel of ancient Stoics remains as pertinent today as it was centuries ago.
So, where does one begin on the journey of applying Stoicism to daily
life? Roman emperor and Stoic philosopher Marcus Aurelius encapsulated the
starting point eloquently: "No role is so well suited to philosophy as the
one you happen to be in right now." In the words of Seneca, "There is
no grace in a benefit that sticks to the fingers."
Here are 10 tools of Stoic philosophy that can transform your life once
for all.
No.1. Work out what’s in your control
A cornerstone of Stoicism is the “control test”, as found in the
Enchiridion is immensely valuable in the modern times. You can use it everyday
to channel your energies in the positive direction.
Epictetus – whose handbook was published
in c.125 CE – wrote: “Within our power are opinion, motivation, desire,
aversion, and, in a word, whatever is of our own doing; not within our power
are our body, our property, reputation, office, and, in a word, whatever is not
of our own doing.”
Essentially, our field of control consists of our own actions and
reactions, our desires, our character and how we treat others. The rest –
including our bodies, the actions of others, our reputation and our fortunes
(personal and financial) – are out of our control.
You can, however, work on how you deal with it. For example, electric
supply has broken down due to raging storm. Out of your control, but your
actions can help protect yourself and others. Stressed-out friend gets too
drunk and takes her loneliness out on you? What she does is out of your
control, but your reaction isn’t.
For every problem, there is a Stoic solution – and the control test is
often the most elegant and simple way of finding our way to it.
No.2. You don’t need
to judge everything
In our fast-paced lives, we often find ourselves passing judgment swiftly, often without the complete picture or when no judgment is truly necessary. The dichotomy of labeling events as either "good" or "bad" shapes our perceptions and significantly influences our responses. Consider the scenario of applying for a rental – the disappointment of missing out is quickly stamped with the judgment of "bad." But what if, in the subsequent week, a superior or more affordable option presents itself?
Embracing a neutral perspective enables us to navigate life with greater resilience, as we become less susceptible to unnecessary distress over fleeting circumstances.
Approaching life events with a neutral lens allows us to acknowledge that
what may initially appear unfavorable could, in time, reveal unforeseen
benefits or alternatives.
No.3. Money, health and reputation are out of your control
In the unpredictable journey of life, the Stoic philosophy offers a profound perspective on navigating the uncontrollable aspects of our existence. According to the control test, money, health, and reputation are inherently beyond our grasp. The Stoic wisdom suggests that cultivating indifference towards these external factors can shield us from unnecessary distress and conserve our energy for more meaningful pursuits.
The reality is that circumstances beyond our control can alter the course
of our lives, irrespective of our actions. One may find themselves stripped of
reputation, job, wealth, home, and even marriage without any fault of their
own. Aging is an inevitable process that inevitably diminishes looks, and over
time, mobility and cognitive abilities may also be compromised. Accidents and
illnesses, indiscriminate in their occurrence, remind us that despite our
utmost caution, vulnerability is an inherent part of the human experience – a
fact emphasized by the Stoics.
Stoics encourage individuals to confront the reality that these
adversities can befall anyone, including oneself, and that death, ultimately,
is an inescapable fate for all.
In the pursuit of a tranquil existence amid life's uncertainties, the
Stoics advocate practicing indifference to material possessions and external
validations. By embracing indifference, individuals can detach themselves from
the fear of impending losses, focusing instead on building inner resilience and
finding solace in the intrinsic value of their character and virtues.
No.4. Practise the conditions that you fear
In the pursuit of emotional resilience, the Stoics offered a profound insight: practice the conditions that you fear. While easier said than done, this philosophy finds practicality in the Stoic tradition of voluntary hardship. Seneca, advising his friend Lucilius, encouraged the practice of fasting to familiarize oneself with scarcity.
The Stoics advocated setting aside specific days to endure the scantiest
fare and don coarse and rough dress, challenging the individual to confront
their fears directly. By asking, "Is this the condition that I
feared?" individuals could evaluate the reality of their anxieties. This
disciplined approach aimed to reveal that often, the anticipated suffering is
less severe than imagined, and an individual's inner strength surpasses their
perceived limits. Embracing resilience through the Stoic lens involves actively
engaging with discomfort, allowing individuals to build mental fortitude and
navigate life's challenges with greater ease.
No.5. Memento Mori-- Practise imagining death
The ancient Stoics, renowned for their philosophy of resilience and wisdom, advocated a unique approach to facing the inevitable reality of death: Memento Mori, the practice of imagining one's own and others' mortality. According to Stoic teachings, grieving for loved ones should occur while they are still alive, prompting individuals to contemplate their eventual passing.
Seneca, a prominent Stoic philosopher, urged individuals to savor the
time spent with friends and children, acknowledging the uncertainty of how long
such privileges will last. The Stoics believed that by frequently contemplating
death, one can dismantle its fear, redirecting focus to the present moment.
Epictetus emphasized this transformative power, stating, "I cannot escape
death – but at least I can escape the fear of it."
In essence, "Embracing the Present: Memento Mori as a Stoic
Practice" highlights the Stoic belief that embracing the reality of
mortality empowers individuals to cherish relationships, release grudges, and
fully engage with the present, ultimately fostering a profound sense of
gratitude and resilience in the face of life's uncertainties.
No.6. Don’t worry about others’ reactions
In a world where societal approval often takes precedence, it's crucial to recognize the wisdom in not being overly concerned with others' reactions. While caring about others is generally valued, the Stoic philosophy emphasizes the significance of focusing on one's character. The four Stoic virtues—wisdom, justice, courage, and moderation—highlight the essence of controlling one's actions and responses.
Stoicism teaches that your character is a realm within your control, but
how others react lies beyond your influence. While you can attempt to influence
or persuade them, their actions and reactions ultimately rest in their hands.
The Stoic advice is clear: invest your energy in how you behave and nurture
your own character, rather than being consumed by the unpredictable responses
of others.
No.7. Moderation is a virtue
Living in a world filled with excess and indulgence, the Roman Stoics, much like us, advocated for moderation. Their guidance on wine consumption serves as a metaphor for embracing balance without making a spectacle of it. Epictetus reminds us that actions undertaken for practice or discipline should not be flaunted needlessly. If drinking water serves a purpose, do it for that reason, without seeking attention.
Stoicism encourages a moderate approach to alcohol, including expensive
wine, with an attitude of indifference. The Stoic recognizes that addiction
poses a danger by clouding reason, yet refrains from tedious preaching about
abstention. In a world where overindulgence is commonplace, the Stoic's
indifference to extravagance becomes a powerful lesson in moderation, echoing
the timeless wisdom of ancient philosophy.
No.8..Give without Expecting a Return
In a world often dominated by transactional relationships, the wisdom of
giving without expecting anything in return carries profound significance.
Seneca's timeless advice urges us to give cheerfully and without hesitation,
emphasizing the lack of grace in a benefit that comes with strings attached.
The idea is to free ourselves from the mental burden of expecting
reciprocation, allowing generosity to flow unconditionally. By applying the
control test, we come to the realization that we have no power over others'
actions. Liberating ourselves from the expectation of favors being repaid
ensures that our acts of kindness remain genuine, unburdened by disappointment.
No.9. Say No to FOMO
Stoicism offers valuable insights into combating the pervasive fear of
missing out (FOMO) that plagues modern society. The Stoics teach us to view
exclusion as a test of character, urging us not to succumb to bitterness or
unhappiness if we aren't invited. Epictetus wisely advises that if something is
good, we should be glad others have it, and if it's not, we shouldn't grieve
its absence. By embracing this perspective, we can appreciate the trade-offs in
life. Missing out on one experience may open the door to another, and the
financial savings from not attending an event can be redirected toward
different endeavors, enriching our lives in unexpected ways.
No.10. Try to Relax
Contrary to the misconception that Stoicism advocates a stiff upper lip,
the essence of Stoic philosophy is to maximize joy and minimize suffering by
cultivating a state of tranquility. The Stoics aimed to be as relaxed as
possible, making it difficult for anger, upset, or anxiety to take hold over
matters beyond their control. Aurelius' timeless counsel encourages us not to
let the uncertainties of the future disturb our present peace. By arming
ourselves with the weapons of reason, we can face the unknown with resilience,
maintaining a calm and composed demeanor.
Incorporating these Stoic principles into our lives enables us to
navigate the complexities of the modern world with grace, resilience, and a
selfless approach to giving. The wisdom of the Stoics transcends time, offering
valuable lessons for cultivating a fulfilling and meaningful existence.
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